Asking the Right Questions

Posted: September 7, 2007 in Church Leadership, Random

At Oak Leaf Church we have some great relationships with a few really good churches. It makes me excited about the future, because I know whatever we face we will have an ally in the business (that sounds like a commercial). I also know that these relationship are fragile and need to be nurtured and protected. We had an experience a couple weeks ago (that I am just becoming aware of) with our staff that has caused me to re-think how our staff is prepped when visiting and learning for other churches.

My observations are two-fold and apply to people well beyond the walls of the local church.

1. If you go to someone for advice, help, or direction they don’t need to learn, nor do they care to hear, how much you know. Another way of saying this is if you ask someone to meet with you for guidance don’t show off, disagree, or try to show them a better way. Keep your mouth shut, observe and take notes. When you get back you can glean the good stuff from the fluff without them ever knowing you have a better idea (if you do).

2. What will impress these people (anyone expert or potential mentor) isn’t how much you can share, but how good your questions are. Right down your questions and think through them before you go. It’s probably a good idea to send them ahead of you to give this person a chance to think through their answers. If you want to be asked back you need to impress them with how well-you have thought through your questions, not what you already learned. If you don’t, they will just think they are wasting their time.

I guess the bottom line is that it hard to teach people the balance, but if you don’t find it you will see your mentors/resources dry up as fast as puddle in Texas…yee haww!

  1. markgarland says:

    I agree. I would really like to go the Newspring sometime and just have them overload me with info and drool all over their “CONTROL” room. Maybe we can get that set up on some Saturday and several of us could go.

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